Stoned Musings

An idea for a post fell out of the sky this morning and landed at my feet.

It didn’t move….

I looked at it for a minute, waiting to see if it would live.

When it didn’t move I bumped it with my foot…

It moved.

Good, it was still alive.

It’s not every day that a good post idea falls out of the sky.

[Scene] New Albany, Mississippi Pilot Truck Stop: Coffee Island

[Players in this scene]

Lady Barista, Trucker that looks like Bob Marley (We’ll call him “Rasta”) and Me.

ACTION!

Lady Barista: “If you guys need anything, just ask”

[Me stirring coffee, Rasta adding creamer]

Me: “What’s the meaning of life?”

Lady Barista: [giggles] “Be happy”

[Scene….Morning……before coffee…..Happiness does not exist on this plane of reality before 6 am]

Me: “No…I’m happy all the time, that’s not it”

Rasta: [laughs]

Lady Barista: [giggles] “You’re not happy this morning?”

Me: “Oh yeah, I’m good….It’s just hard to get anything done with all the clapping and dancing I do glad to be alive”

Rasta: [laughs, now adding sugar]

Lady Barista: “I wish I was in Colorado, I’d be happy all the time”

(Where’d that come from?)

Me: “Well, when I get a chance I’m gonna visit one of those pot stores and just look around at all the legal dope….Get a proximity high”

Rasta: [Nods, sipping]

Lady Barista: [giggles, stocks sweetener in little bins]

Me: “Hmm…Legal pot. Who would’ve thought that would ever happen in my life time?”

[That’s when the idea fell out of the sky]

Rasta: “I didn’t think it’d ever happen…”

Lady Barista: “really….”

Me: “I mean…..imagine just standing there in that store, going thru it and squeezing bags and smelling samples….Like you’re in a grocery store
checking tomatoes and melons”

Rasta: “Can’t imagine…”

Lady Barista: [thoughtful] “Do you think people try to shoplift?”

Me: “I doubt it. Think about this…someone goes into a grocery store, shoplifts some broccoli, instead of calling the cops the bag boys just drag you into the alley and break your legs and beat the shit out of you”

Lady Barista: [gasps, stocks half ’n half] “Really…?!’

[Janitor pushing mop bucket past us]

Rasta: [laughs]

Me: “What’s the point of getting high anymore any ways?” “Just imagine sitting in your house stoned to the gills and not being paranoid about someone
kicking in your door to arrest you…” “No more looking thru the window blinds, no more hiding your rolling tray under the couch, no more trying to find a groovy wooded area to bust off a doobie so no one will see you, no more freaking out when the cops get behind you in traffic, no more sneaking
it into a concert…..”

Rasta: “Wow….I see what you’re saying, that is hard to picture”

Me: “The paranoia was half the fun….”

Lady Barista: “I hated it…”

Rasta….Me [comical look]

Me: “They took away the fact that pot-heads like to get high and thumb their nose at “the man” because of the simple fact it WAS illegal, that was
the other fun part.”

Lady Barista: “I think it should be legal everywhere”

Rasta: “It will be one day…too much money in it, taxes and such”

Me: “They will….and it’ll lose its appeal, due to the fact it is legal, human nature.”

Rasta: “I can’t wait….”

Me: “Yeah, but where do you stop, where do you draw the line?”

Lady Barista: [Nods]

Me: “The only thing we’ll have to worry about is whether we can buy Ramen noodle priced dope or Starbucks priced dope”

Lady Barista: “I wonder if truck stops will ever start selling it, like e-cigs?”

Rasta: “A lot less road rage…”

Me: “The last thing we need is a lot of truckers with the munchies”

Rasta: “Good point”

Lady Barista: “Weird world…”