“Love all, trust few, do wrong to no one.”
-William Shakespeare

A) Doctor says you need a shot and a barium enema, you say “Okee dokee, doc!”

B) Ordering food that you can’t see being prepared.

C) “Your car needs a new transmission.”
“But I came in for a brake light”
“Good thing we caught it then”
“Okee dokee”

D) “Your sins are forgiven”
I never heard Jesus say that… Only a man.

E) “One call, that’s all”

Dear Mr food processing guy,
Please don’t piss off your $8 an hour workers and cause them to become disgruntled so that they shit in the soup.

Dear Mr pharmaceutical billionaire,
Please don’t test your dope on 3rd world countries before we get it. Hell, we’re all Strung out on viagra and Paxil already. We don’t want a bunch of peasants with mood swings and hard-ons making our clothes and mining our diamonds!

Dear Mr Car guy,
Make a car that lasts. Our car used to be part of the family, now it’s a cash strapped relative that doesn’t work.

Dear Mr Chemical guy,
What is yellow #5, and why is it in EVERYTHING!?

Dear Mr Movie guy,
Entertain us, not cram the swill you call “art” now, down our throats and try to shove your agendas up our collective asses! And, why in the hell does popcorn and a drink costs three times more than the ticket does!?
(“Because you keep paying it dumbass”)
Baaah Baaah stupid sheep…

Dear Mr and Mrs Gay persons,
Just stop already, we get it.

Dear Mr Terrorists,
Killing innocent people is good advertising, just add 70 something virgins and you’ll get all the  unemployed, horny young jihadist you can shake a stick at.
If it were true, hell, I’d join.

Crazy Bastards

The real problem is that you actually believe that shit.
Not Islam, your interpretation of it.
Trust me, you’ll DEFINITELY see God… And he’s probably pissed.

Dear Blogger People,
We will change the world if we have a voice of reason and love.

Dear God,
Can I come home now?

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