They put something in my heart.
But, I put something in there first.
I put chili dogs, BBQ, beer, taters, butter, chicken mcnuggets, cholesterol, salt, sugars and fat.
I took my heart for granted and probably still will.
I am paying the piper.
It’s what we do, you see…take things for granted, I mean.
It’s always been there, my heart, doing its thing.
It pumps, it sucks, it works around the clock; for years and years….so far.
Never saying much or protesting unless you scare the crap out of it, cheat on it or cut me a killer deal on some forbidden fruit….
It’s always been here, pumping….so far.
But, 2 nights ago, my chest got tight.
My vision blurred.
I couldn’t clear my throat.
I got scared.
No sweating, no pain in the shoulder, chest or arm….
Just…tightness and fear.
Bad, bad acid reflux….it felt like.
Sometimes being a hypochondriac is a good thing.
I had a little time; I was in Jackson, Mississippi; asleep in my truck at the Petro, and didn’t have to deliver anything quite yet….better get it looked at. Never can tell.
So, at 2am, I decided to go to the ER at University Medical Center to get checked on and maybe some super heart burn meds or mutant antibiotics.
Just to make sure…
“You’ve got an 80% blockage in one of your arteries” They said.
I’m only 50….
I became a participant of a statistic at 3 am in the morning in Mississippi. The state I was born in.
They stuck me with needles full of blood thinners, saline, dyes, contrast and local anesthetics.
The machines beeped, one squeezed my arm and made my fingers swell; one of my fingers had a pulsing red light on it and one told me my blood sugar was 120.
People kept sticking things to the hairiest parts of my body then tearing them all off again; hair, skin and personality dangling from them.
A beautiful blonde shaved my wrist and my crotch…With a pink, vibrating razor.
I think I’m pregnant now.
Her name is Christine.
I hope she calls….
Be still my ailing heart.
Men in masks stood over me, like a scene from M. A. S. H.
No Hawkeye, Klinger or Hot Lips.
Only Hyman, Patel and Ballard.
One teacher, 2 learners….
One patient, patient.
I watched a real time procedure TV as these men shoved a wire into my heart, via my wrist.
The teacher told the attending students “Never do it like that, or this”
I didn’t panic.
I’ve taught before.
I draw the line at “oops”
I watched my veins throb on TV.
I’d never met or seen my heart before.
It looked OK….
I couldn’t tell it had been broken before, a few times.
Maybe that was figurative, after all.
It felt broke though, back then at the time.
I actually thought I was closer to death then as I was, now.
I saw my heart in black, gray, blue, red and golden 3D!
I think I saw some lightning bolts and flying, broken glass flying back at me from the screen.
“No, not like that” said Dr. Hyman.
Please don’t say “oops”
3 men I’d never met before were putting something mechanical into my heart.
Only God had touched my heart up to this point…
And I trusted them?
A small piece of wire mesh is in my heart.
Man had added to what God hath wrought.
I won’t lie.
I’m scared to death.
But, I am grateful that man has achieved great things on this earth and marvel at what we are capable of…both good and bad; by the grace of God.
I am still me…
My heart is still mine and slightly tuned up.
I am scared.
I am grateful.
I am better.
Nutrisystem, here I come!
Maybe, I’ll take up a Hindu diet
The weird part is, I’m scared to live with a Stent in my heart but, I wasn’t scared about the possibility of dying during the procedure.
I realized that, in my own mind and metaphorical whole heart, that I’m more right with God than I realized.
That was a relief…
Thx, University Medical…
You accidentally found my bad heart and fixed it.
I appreciate it but, the mashed potatoes need help.
Oh, thanx to the LDS missionaries that came by and visited and did some Jesus stuff with me.
That meant a lot.