Confessions Of An Abused Husband

This is true.

The names have not been changed to protect the innocent.

I used to be innocent, until “SHE” tricked me.

She is a monster.

Her name is “Wife” aka Sheila but she likes to be called Honey Biscuit….

She doesn’t feed me when I don’t call her that.

Anywho….

My wife does not love me.

Sheila uses me…. Sexually…

She calls me names and spits in my food…

She hates me

She pushed me down the steps at church, once…”Catch him, Jesus!” she cried out.

Jesus didn’t catch me.

She makes me live alone in this lonely truck so I decided to kill myself in my loneliness for being so alone.

I am so lonely that I must look in my little mirror if I don’t want to be alone.

I was so handsome before the loneliness…

She drives by graveyards and says “That’s a nice cemetery”

I know what she’s implying…

Aloneness is so lonely, in this lonely truck.

She would know my aloneness if she didn’t leave me alone in my lonely truck with my little mirror.

She throws rocks at me sometimes, the Wife, I mean.

I love my little mirror.

My only friend.

But she don’t care….Honey Biscuit, I mean.

She wants me to die all alone.

She hit me with a stick, once…

She said I couldn’t have any chickens.

Chickens get lonely too…

I saw her kick a child, once…and steal his lunch money…

Poor lonely chickens.

I am a lonely chicken.

She hates chickens.

My wife only likes pork chops.

I saw her trip an old man, once…and steal his shoes.

He was lonely too.

I don’t like pork chops because they aren’t lonely.
….. Like me.

I am a lonely pork chop that has no friends.

My wife won’t let me have any friends.

She says chickens can’t be friends

I saw her eat a chicken once.

She says she’ll eat my chicken friends.

I don’t wanna be a friendly pork chop.

Did I tell you she hits me…?

I’m sorry, I couldn’t remember. All the brain damage from the beatings, I guess.

Im a little tea pot…

I like Chickens.

Honey Biscuit drives fast thru parades…she likes to watch people run and laugh and somersault over her car.

I saw her run over a boy scout once. He was helping an old lady cross the street…

“Get a walker, Granny!”

That’s what Honey Biscuit shouted out the window.

She laughs funny when she does crazy things…